Monday, March 3, 2008


It's been a hard few weeks. The kids are on the mend, but the sickness is still trailing on. Besides normal wear and tear on the body from exhaustion, Thrush seems to have made a comeback and the pain of nursing sometimes brings tears to my eyes - not at ALL what I had envisioned this time around with the hopes of feeding my baby. Then we find out that Jacob has a business trip to make and will be back JUST in time to go away again - that's OK because we'll be together then. And then - the hope of a nice family trip, rest and relaxation this weekend is now not happening, the kids and I will be staying behind due to some complications. Add on top - the frustration of little comments from family members, like sarcastic "what about when you have 15 kids?" types of comments, and I feel totally sapped of energy and in need of a good cry. But... there's too much catching up to do to actually sit down, journal out all my feelings to the Lord and let the emotions all out. Maybe later tonight after everyone is in bed.

And in the midst of it all God shows His favor on our family.

Psalm 42:8 " Through each day the Lord pours his unfailing love upon me, and through each night I sing his songs, praying to God who gives me life."

Many of you are familiar with the changes in NYS Ed. legislation which is removing all special education services away from homeschooling families. For us personally, this means that Isaac will no longer be receiving speech therapy. I started to work on trying to get that scheduled privately through our health insurance. Just to find out that there's a waiting list for therapy with children on it since the past summer :-( So our last option was to call 2 other student teaching clinics which would mean that although the rate would be reduced, we'd have to pay out of pocket instead of using our health insurance.

I felt totally hopeless and defeated. Then we get a phone call from the private therapy service saying that the head of the Speech Therapy department heard of our situation and why Isaac's therapy was being cut off through the school district. She is personally going to evaluate him and then figure out how they can squeeze him into their schedule anyway.

On one hand, I feel a teensy bit guilty for the children who are still waiting. And yet I acknowledge the hand of God that Isaac's situation caught the ear of the person who could make it happen and that we have His favor and everything that we need for life.

1 Peter 1:3 "
His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness."

I feel like it's the Lord's faithful little reminder to me that even when I'm not feeling well, tired of wishing family would understand our calling and be sensitive to the fact that we're constantly criticized by those who don't share our faith - we certainly don't need that from Christians and family, exhausted by the demands of needs of others and housework beyond my own capacity..... He is still faithful, He provides for all my needs - even when I feel like I'm overwhelmed He is there holding me up, giving me the energy, good health, and means to address every area that He has given me responsibility in. Including the one area (therapy for Isaac) in which I felt was completely out of my control - I didn't need to worry, as He orchestrated everything.

It's not all on my shoulders to carry alone. I only need to be obedient. He will carry it all for me.
Thank you, Jesus!

Psalm 55:22 "
Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall."

1 comment:

Hannah said...

hey katie,
i think you were at the shower on Saturday for Jenn Cavallero?? I heard her open a gift from you but never actually saw you. I got there a little late and left early so I did not visit with many people. What an encouraging story abou the speech therapy! Enjoy the sunshine today!